What To Do?
Tragically, George Floyd is now a household name. I’m sick to my stomach with grief, anger, and fear over what’s transpired in the last week. I fear what we are—as a nation and as a people. There’s no us vs. them. There’s only us—all of us. Together. And unless we can unite in wholeness, in peace, and in unity, we all suffocate from the weight of intolerance, ignorance, and hate. That and change starts from within.
As much progress as we’ve made toward racism in this country, it’s nonetheless perilously woven itself deep into the fabric of our institution in both subtle and overt ways. But how do we start to make things right for people of color, black as well as brown, yellow, red, oh and let’s not forget women, LGBTQ+ folks—so basically anyone who’s not a white man, right? How do we as a nation even begin to reconcile with those who have been disenfranchised?
First, I’m Sorry
Personally, I think a great big fat public apology is in order, an apology from everyone who’s benefitted from the racist hierarchy. Not that it would immediately make things right. But it wouldn't hurt and would be a step in the right direction.
Here’s mine: I’m sorry. I’m sorry to George Floyd. I’m sorry to his family. I’m sorry to any person of color for the ways that this country and the people in it treat them differently. I’m sorry to our indigenous people on whose land we live. I’m sorry to our LGBTQ+ brothers and sisters and those who are non-binary. I’m sorry to the women and children who all too often end up with the short end of the stick. I’m sorry because as a white, straight man, the system is set up to work in my favor and I benefit from it in ways that are both obvious and subtle.
Whether by my choice or not, I’ve benefited from this reality because as much as I love everyone on this earth, regardless of color or sexual orientation, I’m nonetheless a white man and that has undoubtedly given me privileges which have changed my reality more than I’m sure I can ever know. I’m not ashamed of being white no more than anyone should be ashamed for the way they came into this earth, naked, vulnerable, and hopefully wrapped in the loving and protective arms of their mother, which is the way we all deserve to live every day of our life, treated like the most valuable human being that has ever come into existence. Because you are. We all are.
Heart Revolution
Whatever the answer is for this complex and heart-breaking issue, one thing is for sure and it’s that violence is not the answer. I just came from living for a year in France where protest is a national sport. Since long before the French Revolution, the people in France have been telling “The Man” where to stick it. I think peaceful revolution is healthy for society, especially when that revolution is rooted in love and acts from a place of responsiveness rather than reactiveness.
If yoga, Yoga Nidra, and meditation teach us anything, it’s that we must take the information we have, learn to invite it into our Awareness, acknowledge all the ways it affects us, and observe it. Then we must know how to respond to that information. As we do so from the place of observation, every step forward is from a place grounded in our innate goodness, from the portion of Source or God which resides within us which is inextricably connected to LOVE.
WWGD?
Gandhi, perhaps the world’s greatest social revolutionary, understood very well the primary yogic principle of Ahimsa, or non-harming, and insisted on leading the world’s largest social revolution with non-violence at it’s foundation because he understood that no lasting change could happen using the same backward power that had oppressed them. Something that Gandhi understood very well, and which I think this is the kicker here, is that we can’t get there from here, meaning we can’t stop violence and stop hate with more violence and hate. Is it warranted? Of course it is. But to what end? To perpetuate more violence and hate?
But how do we do it? Enough is enough, already! How do we get a little justice around here?! When are we going to start seeing some real change in this world?! (insert your favorite, cathartic expletive here).
For real change, the kind that we all desperately need and, sadly, few believe is even possible, we gotta come at this crucial world-problem from an entirely different mindset. Albert Einstein said, “No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.” To change this desperate world-problem, we gotta up-level our consciousness and that means starting with ourselves. It means doing your yoga and meditation to discover the goodness that is within you to share that with the world.
I believe the first step to creating real change is to stop pointing the fingers at someone else and demanding that THEY change, that they are responsible. We all must choose to be responsible about the solution. Lemme get all yogi on you, here: lasting change in the world can only come from within YOU. Gandhi also said, "If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man (or person) changes his (their) own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him (them).... We need not wait to see what others do." (I added the PC language.)
In a world that has had ENOUGH of hate, the thing that is going to change things around here is love and the place to start is with our own heart.
Love Yourself
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Before we start throwing social distancing to the wind and hugging everything with a pulse, we gotta first do the challenging work to learn to love ourselves. We have to heal our wounds of self-loathing, guilt, and shame. We need to person-up and apologize to others and ourselves for wrongs done, forgive ourselves and others, and learn to really love ourselves first and foremost. This is the first and crucial step to be able to extend that love to others.
Psychologist, author, and world-renown peacemaker Marshall Rosenberg, in his incredible work on non-violent communication, says that in order to love another person, you must first learn to love yourself through positive self-talk, self-image, and affirmation.
When we can learn to love ourselves, we can then extend that love toward everyone, especially those who have been disenfranchised. Then (steel yourself, here) we can even learn to love the oppressor.
Now listen, I believe that black lives matter. I am sick and tired of seeing police brutality, especially toward people of color. I believe that those who use excessive violence should be corrected and denied the privilege to wear the sacred badge of a protector of our society. I believe you shouldn’t get another chance to “protect and serve” if you’ve proven yourself unable. Forgive, yes. Remain on the force, no.
I also believe that being a cop is a very difficult job and that the great majority of law enforcement in this country serve very honorably and put their lives at risk all the time. And I believe that they do this despite the fact that there is institutional racism woven into the system. So cops, hats off to you.
Can we just all agree to stop the violence inward and outward and just love? It’s that simple. We are all people. We are all somehow One. Fighting another member of this great organism called humanity is like an auto-immune disease, one part fighting another in some doomed attempt at wholeness. It’s as trite as it is true: love is the only answer. Who cares if there have been a billion cheesy pop songs about it. It’s still true!
My prayer:
May we first learn to love ourselves. May we then extend that love to those around us. Then to those we don’t know, and possibly don’t trust, most likely because we don’t know. May we mindfully ground ourselves in love and with that firm foundation stand our ground against all oppression knowing that everyone, everywhere has that same love within them somewhere, even those who have forgotten where it is. May we source the most magical power in the Universe, one exponentially greater than violence, that of love, and may we wield this power to change the world.
Start with yourself and start today.
Please take a moment and listen to this free Loving Kindness for compassion recording I’ve made, especially for these times. It will activate your heart and put every person involved in this issue, including yourself, on the sacred altar of your heart to heal us all from the illusion that we are separate beings.
I love you.
Thank you and namaste.